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There are moments when the most profound
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response to folly is no response at all.
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When to speak is to lower yourself to
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the ground the fool is standing on. When
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silence itself becomes a kind of
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teaching. We are addicted to response to
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correction to the urgent necessity of
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being heard. We live in an age that
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equates silence with agreement with
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defeat with cowardice. So we react, we
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defend, we explain, we correct again.
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And in doing so, we give the foolish
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person exactly what they want.
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But the book of Proverbs contains
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something counterintuitive.
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Do not answer a fool according to his
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folly, or you yourself will be just like
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him. answer a fool according to his
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folly or he will be wise in his own
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eyes. Read that twice. The tension is
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intentional. There are moments when you
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answer and moments when you do not. The
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difference is not the fool. The
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difference is whether your answer serves
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truth or merely feeds vanity. Consider
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what silence does that words cannot.
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Silence does not validate the question
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as important enough to engage. Silence
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suggests that the person speaking
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already understands the answer and has
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chosen not to entertain the distraction.
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Silence has a kind of authority that
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argumentation simply does not. This is
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why the wise person becomes selective
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about their speech. Not because they are
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afraid, but because they understand
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something. Not every statement deserves
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a response. Not every argument deserves
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a contestant. James says, "Those who
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consider themselves religious and yet do
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not keep a tight reign on their tongues
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deceive themselves." Control of speech
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is presented as a mark of spiritual
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maturity, not weakness. The question is
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not whether you can defend yourself. It
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is whether defending yourself in this
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moment serves anything larger than your
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own pride. Sometimes the answer is
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silence. Let that land.
